Comments on: Saying goodbye to Abuelo

By: Sam Berns

Sam Berns — Sun, 24 Sep 2006 02:16:29 +0000

Came here looking for a review between Adobe Captivate and Camtasia tutorial video, ended up reading about your grandfather and was deeply moved. What a life he’s lived and you wrote about it so well, thanks for sharing it and my sympathies go out to you and your family.

By: cloudscome

cloudscome — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:51:15 +0000

What a sweet and touching post. I am sorry for your loss. Your Abuelo sounds so wonderful!

By: Steve Lawson

Steve Lawson — Wed, 20 Sep 2006 03:45:29 +0000

Meredith, my belated sympathies on your loss, and thanks for the wonderful portrait of this man.

By: Christine Brown

Christine Brown — Tue, 19 Sep 2006 15:48:10 +0000

What a wonderful tribute to your grandpa. My condolences.

By: Meredith Farkas

Meredith Farkas — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 18:52:08 +0000

Thank you all so much for your kind thoughts and rememberences of your family members. It is an absolute tragedy that so many of our lives have been touched by Alzheimers in one way or another; it is so unfair to see people we love who were once so vital basically fall apart like that. On the other hand, we were all so lucky to have that kind of love in our lives. I feel incredibly grateful for the love I have had — for my parents, my grandparents, my husband and my friends. Love gives us so much strength.

I’m still having weepy moments a few times a day, but I’m hanging in there.

By: Steve Oberg (Family Man Librarian)

Steve Oberg (Family Man Librarian) — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 17:32:11 +0000

Meredith, at the risk of sounding sort of like “me too” I wanted to add my condolences to others’. And thank you for writing about your grandparents. Your post resonated with me for many reasons but especially because I too had a grandpa who died of Alzheimer’s and he and my grandma were the only grandparents I ever knew. I was too young to remember my paternal grandparents.

Grandparents are quite simply, the best. I was particularly close to my grandma. She died first, at least in part due to the stress and workload of caring for my grandpa. We didn’t know how bad it was until after she died and we took my grandpa into our home to care for him. He was incontinent and often incoherent and confused. My four older brothers and I took turns changing his diapers and generally caring for him. Unfortunately most of the time, he thought we were trying to hurt him and I can well remember trying to help him and trying to change his diapers while he was beating me and hitting me and in great distress. Alzheimer’s is a terrible disease and I often felt like my dear grandpa had died long before his actual death.

For several years at the end of their lives (and before my grandpa became too far gone with Alzheimer’s), my grandparents lived next door to us in a house that my parent’s provided. There was a well worn path between our houses with traffic back and forth. I loved spending time with my grandparents, who had had a very full and also somewhat tragic life. They were world travellers who had been everywhere and had seen so many things. I loved hearing about their memories, e.g. my grandfather was a cook for many years as a young man in Scotland on a fishing vessel in the North Sea before he emigrated to the U.S., and he would tell us stories of special things that happened during that time. During a very dark period in our own home, my grandparents were a ray of sunshine and love. Most days after school I would go over there to have tea and crackers or cookies with them. They carried on the ways of “The Old Country” including tea at 11a and at 3 or 4p each day.

I miss them still, more than 20 years after their deaths.

By: Paul R. Pival

Paul R. Pival — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 15:02:38 +0000

Thank you for sharing, Meredith, and condolences.

By: dave free

dave free — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 14:48:01 +0000

Meredith – I’m very sorry for your loss. Your Grandfather sounds like a great man. My Grandmother suffered a long battle with Alzheimers before she passed so you have my deepest sympathy.

By: Alane

Alane — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 14:27:43 +0000

Meredith, what a perfect memorial and tribute to your Abuelo. Beutifulkly written and very moving. My condolences to you and the rest of your family.
My maternal Granpa was in the Merchant Marine also. He died in 1981. In WWII, he served on an escort corvette for supplies convoys in the North Atlantic…a pretty horrific task as the convoys were sitting ducks for torpedoes. When the Merchant Marine sailors finally became eligible for medals–as you note–my father, who had admired his ex-father-in-law, applied for Granpa’s medal posthumously. If you’ve not been, the War Museum in London, England has an exhibit devoted to the service of those in the Merchant Marine.

By: bibliotecaria

bibliotecaria — Mon, 18 Sep 2006 12:21:20 +0000

Man, what a tribute! I’m glad you have so much time with them. My condolences on your loss, and remember that you have the right to grieve as much as you need to.